Do you think this is love?
by Mione of the Dragon
Summary: Anakin and Amidala love each other greatly, but destiny will make them be apart. A love condemed to doomed could be wonderful? Everyone around seems to be against it. How long could they keep their secret and to what cost?
1. Default Chapter

A/N: What can I say? I love Hayden, he's so gorgeous and this is a A/A story, I had never been too good at the beginnings, I'll be more expressive when I know your opinions, 'til that PLZ REVIEW.

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Do You Think This is Love? 

By: I'm-a-dreamer 

E-mail: Ddg_xxx@hotmail.com 

Prologue 

I hope she is having a calm rest. She seems so placid while resting; she was so exhausted after the birth. 

Leia, my beautiful daughter borne from my life's love and my life's hate. Leia is almost the exact replica of Amidala. It's such a God bless she hasn't any trait from _him._ But the boy… 

He has _his _features: blond sandy hair, same blue eyes; sending him away was the best thing I could have done. 

If Amidala had looked at him she would have been only reminded of the past, disturbed by a ghost. A shadow that creeps through the night to her layer and that only makes her scream at night. 

She sleeps by my side, while calling and longing him, still wanting him after all the things that he has done. 

I lay quite, without uttering a single word when I know that she's thinking of _him_. I respected because I love her too much to even try to touch her. I love her since I can remember. We were engaged and were suppose to live happily ever after, until _he _appeared or better said, reappeared in her lifelike a sudden thunder in a sunny calm day. 

_Him, _with only nineteen years of existence, took away her heart, body and soul. What a clever thief! Nobody took notice until it was too late: he had stolen her heart already. In only few weeks he made true my life's dream. 

I was twenty-seven years old at that time when a boy stole a twenty-three years old Senator and ex Queen's heart. She had fall in love with him when we were engage. I knew that she was only marrying me because it would be an excellent treat for Naboo to have an alliance with Alderaan; she was never in love with me. The last time that I saw her before all had happen, was when she boarded the ship that took her to Coruscant since there was an attempt on her life. After the long time that we were apart I went to Naboo again. An informant of my utter trust told me about the rumors that were circulating through there. 

"People is telling that she has an immoral relationship with that kid," I remember my informant said. 

"What kid? What you are talking about? Please explain yourself immediately," I asked. 

"Anakin Skywalker, the Naboo hero of the Trade Federation. He is going to be a Jedi; he is Master Kenobi's padawan and is supposed to be the legendary 'Chosen One'." 

The memory of the famous 'Chosen One' came to my mind. I thought that it was only a Jedi's legend. 

"Jedis are forbidden for love, and I that such a delicate Senator with high moral values would mingle herself with that youth; it would be simple too wicked," I remember I replied. I truly believed it. Great was my surprise… 

I can tell now. 

"But your Highness, the people is commenting about the great closeness that they have. They say he is emotional, not a normal Jedi. People says they have an affair-" 

"ENOUGH! Don't you dare to speak about Senator Amidala like that ever again!" 

"Sorry Sir," He looked scare at me, "I'm just telling what people is commenting." 

I remember I entered the Theed Palace looking for Amidala, and I saw her with in the gardens. They were sitting near a cascade. He had a broad smile, and I could saw her eyes shinning with an immense intensity every time she looked at him. 

I felt jealous, jealous of a boy that was forbidden for love and a former slave? 

Yes, I was. 

Yes, I still am. 

They were smiling to each other. He put a strand of chestnut hair behind her ear. She looked down and blushed a bit. Then, she caressed with one slender finger his jaw line. 

When she saw me, was very surprised, nervous, pale I dare to say, even scared. But, well, how couldn't she after what she had done? 

Our wedding was planned to be after a month from that day when my worst fear came to hunt my peace. My fear _had _and _has_ the face of a bright electric blue eye, blond, athletic teen. 

Our wedding was canceled; she had already married the kid. To make it shorter, I jump a part and will say that Anakin went to the Clone Wars. She waited him. The citizens weren't informed of the changes, but at the end it wasn't necessary. 

He never came back… 

He is alive. 

He is dead. 

He is an angel. 

He is a demon. 

He is all and is nothing, all at the same time. 

Anakin Skywalker is 'dead'. 

Lord Darth Vader is 'alive'. He turned to the Dark Side. 

Like everyone said, the boy was (and is) too emotional and arrogant to be a Jedi. 

He ripped her heart into pieces. Mine was ripped too. Everything related to Anakin Skywalker was and is hate. People's rumors came to the Palace doors. They wanted to know the true about their beloved Senator and highly remember ex Queen. 

The thing was that one day I found her crying. We talked, she told me that it seems that she was pregnant. She was going to have a child, from a secret, forbidden and hidden marriage. And it was the child of a merciless, corrupted, child, a minor according to Naboo code, no less. 

It was a big mess. First I couldn't believe how a woman with so many high values and intelligence as Amidala couldn't resist the sins of the flesh. Then I knew: she had completely fallen in love. She had quit the fight and had given herself in body, heart and soul to Anakin. 

I offered her my help; I still loved her. 

She married me because she hadn't any other option. We got married and the rumors dissipated. 

People went happy when her pregnancy was officially announced, after a month after the wedding of course. Only Yoda, Obi-Wan, my informant, Amidala and I knew and know the truth. 

That day I remembered founding her in her chambers in my palace, crying helplessly with a black rose in her hands. I didn't ask her anything; I knew I had to give her space. 

"BY THE GRACE OF LADY VADER!" 

One day a prisoner pleaded in front of the Alderaan court. He kneeled in front of Amidala, the new titled Queen of Alderaan. Murmurs were heard around the whole room. 

"Lady Vader?" My people asked themselves in shock awing at their beautiful Queen. Memories of the demon with an angel face flooded through many minds. 

"SHUT UP YOU BLAMFEME!" I shouted higher than I intended. 

Amidala simply made a gesture with her hand that indicated me to calm myself. 

She bravely stood up and spoke, "Explain yourself." 

A simple command but given with regally. 

"U see my dear 'ma'am' you can't hide the evident true from us: you are carrying the child of a monster," murmurs were loud, "a bastard from a bastard, well, from a 'Lord'," he concluded in a mocking tone. 

Amidala had here head up, but I could see her eyes beginning to water from the memories. She finally spoke in her royal tone, "Do you consider my King a bastard and a monster?" 

People began to laugh at her sarcasm. She had fixed the situation with a very clever comment. When we spoke after that she said that she hadn't lied, _he_ was the King of her heart. 

I had take care of her during all this time; she gave me nothing, only her presence. I never touched her even once I always sleep on the couch or on the floor for not letting people suspect. The punishment for her would be death. 

I'm looking again at my beautiful baby daughter; she is going to be a Queen someday and I don't care what I will have to do for her to not discover that her true father isn't dead, but isn't alive either. 

That it isn't me, even if I wish. 

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REVIEW PLZ.

Next chapter it's goin' to be the beginning. 


	2. A Long, Long Time Ago, I Can Still Remem...

A/N: This is the 1st chapter. It's from Padmé's point of view. 

Disclaimer: Nothing it's mine, even if I wish I own Hayden J. 

*** 

"Do you think this is Love?" 

By: Dreamy Dreamer (a.k.a I'm-a-dreamer) 

E-mail: Ddg_xxx@hotmail.com 

Chapter #I: "A long, long time ago, I can still remember" 

Journal- Day trip 16: 

The trip has been seldom bored until now. Nothing had happened. In a way, that's a good sign. The good thing is that tomorrow we will be finally arriving Coruscant. We had to leave Naboo in a rush and under a disguise. This ship isn't fancy; it's just a normal one. That's okay with me even if it is a little uncomfortable, but in that way we will make it to Coruscant without being notice. Changing of theme, at last I informed the Queen about my resolution to accept the offer of marriage of the King Bail from the neighbor planet Alderaan. I will get marry in a month or two. 

In such violent times extreme measures are necessary, and even from my position of Senator if I can help my people by this alliance, I will. Anyway I never imagined myself getting married with anyone. Marriage is just an agreement of union in need of protection, an accord. Things aren't like in the books I once read when I was a little girl. I don't think I will be able to love somebody someday. I used to think that sooner or later people had to fall, but now I don't think that anymore. It isn't realistic!

I remember when I read from a friend's letter, a phrase, '**To notice someone takes only a second, to like someone takes only a minute, to fall in love for someone takes only an hour, but to forget takes a whole life,**' 

Come on! What you can easily feel in only an hour can be obviously forgot in one as well.

I don't believe in love, I believe in compassion and devotion for a common good, but not for only one person. The Queen told me that my marriage would be an excellent treaty, but since that I'm no longer the Queen I could do as I pleased.

'Having or not having the crown over my head can't change the deep devotion I have to my subjects, nor my debt to them. This people appreciate me, and their appreciation only makes my debt and choice more right than ever before,' I told the Queen.

She looked at me and then she wished me a tranquil trip.

It's late and I'm tired. Tomorrow morning I will be arriving at Coruscant and I will have to look properly, without circle under my eyes. Goodnight.

_Padmé Amidala _

Life has too many twists; one day you can be living happy and normally, and at the very next moment your life can change. 

Someone tried to kill me last night, my ship was attacked but there was no harm. And today when I arrived at Coruscant there was another attempt, Cordé is dead. 

I am now in the Jedi Temple waiting for the Jedi Council to finish their meeting. I wonder what they are talking about, what is taking so much time? 

I remembered I gave into the Naboo's people's desire: I'm going to marry Bail and become the Queen of Alderaan. This union will be very beneficiating, and anyway it doesn't matter who I marry or not because either way I don't think I'm destine to fall in love. The 'First Sight Love' thing only happens in books as the 'Eternal Love' thing. I wrote about it last night in my journal. 

"Senator," Yoda entered the room silently without me noticing it. 

"Master Yoda," I greeted him bowing slightly my head. 

"Sending with you Jedis, we are going to. Master Obi-Wan Kenobi and his young Padawan Anakin Skywalker with you they will be sent," the small green old Jedi Master began to walk away from me and he entered the silver door in the left side of the room, "please Senator, follow me." 

I entered the room in company of Captain Panaka and two of my handmaidens. Yes, I still have handmaidens. Being a Queen isn't exactly the right way to teach you how to take care of yourself. Even if I'm a Senator now, that doesn't mean that I know how to handle common manual problems. 

In the room are two hood men. 

"Master Kenobi, remember the Senator I think you do," Yoda spoke and Obi-Wan pulled his hood back revealing a much mature face than ten years ago. He has now a thick brown bear. He doesn't look bad, but he looks kind of funny to me. 

"Senator, It's nice to see you after so long time," Obi-Wan greeted me. 

"It's nice to see you too, Master Kenobi." 

Yoda was about to introduce the other man who was taller than Obi-Wan, when I interrupted him when a realization suddenly came into my mind, "ANI! Ani is that you !?" 

OH MY GOD! I can't believe is him, "My Goodness you have grown up!" 

He pulled back his hood and he leaved me totally mesmerize. He looks like a man; he is tall, muscular, has perfect features; two electric blue shinning eyes are making me to skip several beats. 

A million of thoughts and old images are crossing my head right now in an amazing speed, so many things to think about in only one second. 

One second is enough to realize how many things can change? 

When did he get so taller? So gorgeous? So tempting? 

When did he leaved his child body frame? 

When did he start to make me sweat with just staring at me on a second? 

"You too have grown up. More beautiful, I mean," He told me, his eyes looking directly at mine giving this strange sensation I can feel going through my spine and making my hands sweat. 

The last time I had saw him was so long ago, I can still remember. 

I can still remember his child figure and his sweetness. 

I can still remember the way he made me feel, like if I was a kind of a little temporal mother to him. He awoke in me a maternal nature I didn't know I had before meeting him 

To be honest with myself, I can't believe how much he has change. Neither the way he makes me feel now. 

So uncomfortable… 

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A/N: Please REVIEW, the faster you REVIEW the faster I will load more chapters. It encourages me. 


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